On any given day I never know what is going to leap out.
My wife has asked me how it is that I never seem to get writer’s block and my response is that when you cover the Arab-Israel conflict there is always, but always, something to write about. Not a day goes by in which so much pure stupidity doesn’t come pouring out of my computer screen that I am not forced to write about it.
So, for example, this morning I was perusing the Elder of Ziyon’s site when I came across a link to this Times of Israel article by a young, ex-IDF soldier, Hen Mazzig, who is now doing pro-Israel outreach in the Pacific Northwest of the United States, which happens to be where I live. He writes:
“To give you a taste of the viciousness of the BDS attacks, let me cite just a few of the many shocking experiences I have had. At a BDS event in Portland, a professor from a Seattle university told the assembled crowd that the Jews of Israel have no national rights and should be forced out of the country. When I asked, “Where do you want them to go?” she calmly answered, “I don’t care. I don’t care if they don’t have any place else to go. They should not be there.” When I responded that she was calling for ethnic cleansing, both she and her supporters denied it. And during a presentation in Seattle, I spoke about my longing for peace between Israel and the Palestinians. When I was done, a woman in her 60’s stood up and yelled at me, “You are worse than the Nazis. You are just like the Nazi youth!” A number of times I was repeatedly accused of being a killer, though I have never hurt anyone in my life. On other occasions, anti-Israel activists called me a rapist. The claims go beyond being absurd – in one case, a professor asked me if I knew how many Palestinians have been raped by IDF forces. I answered that as far as I knew, none. She triumphantly responded that I was right, because, she said, ‘You IDF soldiers don’t rape Palestinians because Israelis are so racist and disgusted by them that you won’t touch them.'”
I would like to suggest that it is not merely Israeli Jews who are so racist against Arabs that they won’t rape them, but diaspora Jews are equally racist and refuse to rape them, as well.
Y’know, the other day I was strolling down Market Street when I ran into my friend Shafiqah. I’ve known Shafiqah since my days at San Francisco State University and when I saw her on the street she seemed a bit miffed. I had not seen Shafiqah in quite awhile, because people sometimes have a tendency to come and go in this world, but I was a little surprised to see that she was irked with me.
I figured that maybe she was reading my writings!
But, no, that was too far-fetched. So, she comes up to me and says, “Lumish, how come you never raped me? What? Are you so racist toward my people that the very idea of raping an Arab woman disgusts you? Do you have such loathsomeness in your heart for me and my family and my people that you won’t rape a single one of us?”
Then she spit on me and walked away.
Nonetheless, what I recommend to my fellow Jews everywhere is to not rape people.
Don’t rape Eskimos. Don’t rape Jehovah’s Witnesses. Don’t rape Rastafarians. Don’t rape Rosicrucians. And particularly do not rape Arabs. It may upset them, or some of their friends in places like the University of California, Berkeley, but you are under no moral obligation to rape anyone.
Every once in awhile you may feel that a pity-rape is in order so as to demonstrate your open-mindedness, liberality, and commitment to the multicultural ideal. You may even come to think that your disinclination to rape, say, Mennonites – why not? – represents your racist ill-will toward Mennonites. My suspicion, however, is that the great majority of Mennonites will not mind if you do not rape them, or their women, and they probably will not hold it against you.
In fact, I have never yet heard anyone complain about the general Jewish disinterest in raping Mennonite women. Day after day, month after month, and year upon year, Jewish men fail to rape Mennonite women and somehow college professors throughout the country have said not a word concerning our obviously malignant racism toward Mennonites.
How is it that if we fail to rape Arabs we are castigated as racists and, yet, if we also fail to rape Mennonites we are not castigated as racist anti-Mennonites? But, I guess the most pertinent question is, how is it that we are failing to keep up our end of the obligation to rape non-Jews? Is it possible that the professor who spoke with Mr. Mazzig is correct and that the reason that Jews fail to rape either Arabs or Mennonites – or, say, the Easter Islander – is due to a flaw in our collective character?
Are the Jewish people such horrible human beings that we cannot even bring ourselves to rape our friends and neighbors? Well, I am here to tell you that the answer to that question is “yes” and you should all be ashamed of yourselves!
I was raised to believe that Israel is a Light Unto the Nations or Light Upon the Nations – or that it somehow has something to do with lighting something – and now I can no longer believe it and must, instead, believe that the Jewish State of Israel is a vile and disgusting place filled with vile and disgusting Jews who are so busy (and selfishly) creating computer software and sending Natalie Portman’s out into the world that they cannot even bring themselves to show basic human decency by committing acts of non-volitional sex with non-Jews.
Or, wait! Maybe it’s even worse than that. Could it be that the great majority of Jews are actually anti-Semites because we fail to rape Jewish women, as well?
Oh, for G-d’s Sake, now I won’t sleep tonight!